While I stand firmly in favor of protected privacy, it is not without a certain wry amusement I note the irony of having endured nearly 10 years of people emailing thinly veiled innuendo, outright sexual propositions, and more unsolicited dick pics than I care to remember, only to now sit here writing an entire page dedicated to the assurance I will not misuse whatever data my readers share with me during their time on this site.
I ain’t gonna do shit with your data, because I don’t give even a single fuck.
This page exists because I was legally compelled to create and post it.
Rules and regulations may change, but my opinion on your privacy never has and never will. I don’t respect it more today than I did yesterday or last week. My interaction with your data will also be unchanged.
I am not going to do anything malicious or unsavory with your data. I submit to you as proof of this that I never have, despite nearly a decade of having had ample opportunity to do so.
Lest I lead you to believe my unchanging position stems from vast stores of virtue, allow me to clarify that these are not the attitudes of an ethicist, but a nihilist.
My refusal, therefore, to misuse or abuse your data is grounded less in an aversion to the iniquity and moral turpitude inherent in such acts and more in the sloth endemic to overwhelming apathy.
Put another way: I ain’t gonna do shit with your data, because I don’t give even a single fuck.
But, rules is rules, so here’s a breakdown of all the shit I’m NOT going to do with your data.
Who We Are
Firstly, let us note that henceforth all references made with regard to the Site and the Company are in the plural. Not because the size of our staff necessitates it, but rather because use of the Royal We suits Our sensibilities.
Our website address is http://jromaniello.wpengine.com.
Evidently, it is necessary to specify that.
What Data We Collect and Why We Collect It
The below sections outline the conditions under which specific pieces of data are collected and give a general overview of how and why it is collected.
When visitors leave comments on the site we collect the data shown in the comments form, as is the IP address and browser user agent string. This is all done to help detect and prevent spam.
Data Used: We use a third-party plugin called Akismet to prevent spam. As this is enabled, the contact form submission data (IP address, user agent, name, email address, website, and message) is submitted to the Akismet service (also owned by Automattic) for the sole purpose of spam checking. The actual submission data is stored in the database of the site on which it was submitted and is emailed directly to the site. This email will include the submitter’s IP address, timestamp, name, email address, website, and message.
Data Synced (?): Post and post metadata associated with a user’s contact form submission. As Akismet is enabled, the IP address and user agent originally submitted with the comment are synced, as well, as they are stored in post meta.
When you leave a comment on RFS, you may opt-in to save your name, email address and website in cookies. These are for your convenience so that you do not have to fill in your details again when you leave another comment. These cookies will last for one year.
Embedded Content From Other Websites
Articles on this site may include embedded content (e.g. videos, images, articles, etc.). Embedded content from other websites behaves in the exact same way as if the visitor has visited the other website.
For all of our products sold directly through the site, payment processing is handled by PayPal.
Data Used: Transaction amount, transaction currency code, product title, product price, product ID, order quantity, PayPal payer ID, and PayPal transaction ID.
Activity Tracked: The PayPal payer ID, transaction ID, and HTTP referrer are sent with a payment completion tracking event.
Data Synced (?): PayPal transaction ID, PayPal transaction status, PayPal product ID, quantity, price, customer email address, currency, and payment button CTA text.
Data Used: IP address, WordPress.com user ID (if logged in), WordPress.com username (if logged in), user agent, visiting URL, referring URL, a timestamp of the event, browser language, country code.
Please note that this site does not have access to any of this information via this feature. For example, we can see that a specific post has 285 views, but we cannot see which specific users/accounts viewed that post. Stats logs — containing visitor IP addresses and WordPress.com usernames (if available) — are retained by Automattic for 28 days and are used for the sole purpose of powering this feature.
Data Used: Please refer to the appropriate Google Analytics documentation for the specific type of data it collects. As this site uses WooCommerce (also owned by Automattic) and having all purchase tracking explicitly enabled, purchase events will send Google Analytics the following information: order number, product id and name, product category, total cost, and quantity of items purchased. Though Google Analytics does offer IP anonymization, we do not currently have that enabled.
Activity Tracked: This feature sends pageview events (and potentially video play events) over to Google Analytics for consumption. Resultant of our usage of WooCommerse, some additional events are also sent to Google Analytics, such as shopping cart additions and removals, product listing views and clicks, product detail views, and purchases.
Data Used: A visitor’s preference on viewing the mobile version of the site..
Activity Tracked: A cookie (akm_mobile) is stored for 3.5 days to remember whether or not a visitor of the site wishes to view its mobile version. Learn more about this cookie.
Data Used: In order to check login activity and potentially block fraudulent attempts, the following information is used: attempting user’s IP address, attempting user’s email address/username (i.e. according to the value they were attempting to use during the login process), and all IP-related HTTP headers attached to the attempting user.
Activity Tracked: Failed login attempts (these include IP address and user agent). We also set a cookie (jpp_math_pass) for 1 day to remember if/when a user has successfully completed a math captcha to prove that they’re a real human.
Data Synced (?): Failed login attempts, which contain the user’s IP address, attempted username or email address, and user agent information.
With Whom We Share Your Data
Absolutely fucking no one. With the exception of the cases listed above–wherein data you submit through our site using third-party service or plugin may be automatically collected by that service–none of your data is shared with any person or company.
Where We Send Your Data
Absolutely fucking nowhere. With the exception of the cases listed above–wherein data you submit through our site using third-party service or plugin may be automatically collected by that service–none of your data is sent anywhere.
Example: Your comments may be checked through an automated spam detection service, but RFS doesn’t do anything with it on our end.
How Long We Retain Your Data
If you leave a comment, the comment and its metadata are retained indefinitely. This is so we can recognize and approve any follow-up comments automatically instead of holding them in a moderation queue.
For users that register on our website (if any), we also store the personal information they provide in their user profile. All users can see, edit, or delete their personal information at any time (except they cannot change their username). Website administrators can also see and edit that information.
What Rights You Have Over Your Data
If you have an account on this site or have left comments, you can request to receive an exported file of the personal data we hold about you, including any data you have provided to us. You can also request that we erase any personal data we hold about you. This does not include any data we are obliged to keep for administrative, legal, or security purposes.
Okay. That should satisfy all the legal shit.
I’m assuming less than 1% of people who come to this site will ever read this. So, if that’s you, cool. You’re so thorough. Be proud.